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Saturday, October 30, 2010

Random Thoughts of the Night!

As I stare at my little girl sleeping with such ease, my mind drift to thoughts of what's to be.  If someone would have told me 10 years ago that I would be a single mother of an intelligent little girl, an author, entrepreneur and grad student without a husband; I would have told them to keep dreaming.  Now, I can't see my life without any of it including the husband.  Tonight my thoughts are random in the selection of past, present and future ideas, however one is selective:  Am I destine to do this alone for my life?  This has to be the thought of every single parent at some point, right?  Or am I the only one who thinks this?

I can't help but look at her and feel that she is missing out on so much, by my selective behavior in the opposite sex.  But when I think of how much she means to me and how much I want her life to be as diverse and full of greatness, one thought comes to mind:  How can I not be selective in who I introduce into our lives?

As the story continues to unfold, I dream of grander times when I can share this life that I am building with a person willing to accept the gift that we have to offer!  I struggle with not revealing to much or being to personal on this blog; however these random thoughts tonight needed to be expressed! 

I hope you don't mind.  Have a great Halloween Everyone!

7 comments:

Mrs. K said...

Thanks for sharing your lovely thoughts. I grew up with a mother who raised me as single parent and I'm thankful because she protected me and I was not subject to some of the scary things that other people had to face with a step parent. I appreciate my mother for making such a great sacrifice but I also feel bad sometimes because she gave so much up for me. Regardless I have so much respect and love for her. Sounds like you are doing a great job with your daughter and being a good role model for her :)

Inspire All said...

I too was raised by a single parent me and my brother. Fortunately, my dad was active in our lives. But my mother worked two jobs and was always making sure that we were okay. We never had to worry about a step-parent or her dating either. Like you I feel bad because she is still not married and we both are out of the house. But never the less, I love her for the example that she set for me as a parent.

Quiskaeya said...

Selective. Absolutely. You said it perfectly when you spoke about what a precious gift you have in your daughter and that you can't afford not to be selective. I was raised in a whole family and often I wonder how I became a single mother when I had such great examples of marriage. However, as single parents we can't beat ourselves up for what we aren't doing (not having a spouse) but simply put one foot in front of the other and do our best. Having the everlasting love would be nice, but I promised myself if I marry again it better be the last...lol

Inspire All said...

@Quiskaeya..During these times we can't help but be selective both mom's and dad's. I enjoy being a single parent and I feel that the bond that I have with my daughter would not have been this tight had I been marriage(I don't know); however, it is nice to have that other person to share all of your experiences with. Not being blind to the fact that I could have a spouse and the marriage could still be like being a single parent. My prayer is always to have a like-minded individual.....(and you know the rest). For now, I am humbly greatful for my life and child as I know you are as well. Thank you for your comments as always, they helps me realize that I am not alone!

Mrs. K said...

Hey me again, thanks for stopping by my blog and leaving a comment. Re: the sweet plantains with cinnamon--yes, they are mainly eaten as a dessert. I must say that I cheated--it's not really a Jamaican thing to eat it that way. I got the idea from a website and they were delicious. People eat it like that with ice cream but I haven't tried it with ice cream (yet). :)

Jamie said...

You are not alone in your thoughts. I never wanted or thought I would be married, have kids, live where I live or adopt and I've done all of the above. I've come to realize that the path we walk is beyond our control in the sense that we can make decisions as to which direction to take but for the most part we always end up where we are called to be and where we are needed the most. I found your blog via Hop Along Friday and I really look forward to following along!
Blessings,
j
www.beneaththeacaciatree.com

♥Yaya's Mommy ♥ said...

I am your newest follower. Have a great week. :)